Funny exam responses

[benladesh]

[Xandra]

The classic stolen from "Amusing pictures":

Of course, the problem is that however funny it is, that's an extraordinarily simple problem.

Pythagorean theorem FTW.

[Kenjiro]

Some more classics






This one isn't exactly school-related, but funny as hell

[Morningstar]

OMG, *wipes eyes*, these are hilarious. I love the elephant one. I only wish I had been clever enough to think up something like that when I didn't know the answer to a problem. And the paper on Walt Whitman????? Oh my, I can just see the teacher's vein popping out in his forehead while reading it. The cake recipe. What a great idea! These are priceless.

[Dragonfire]

OMG, *wipes eyes*, these are hilarious. I love the elephant one. I only wish I had been clever enough to think up something like that when I didn't know the answer to a problem. And the paper on Walt Whitman????? Oh my, I can just see the teacher's vein popping out in his forehead while reading it. The cake recipe. What a great idea! These are priceless.

If my English teacher from my senior year of high school saw that paper, she would kill someone. Seriously. xD

[Kugetsu]

Supposed to be "real" science test answers, but since they aren't on pictures, you never know.

"When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire."

"H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water"

"To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube"

"When you smell an odorless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide"

"Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state"

"Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water."

"Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillars."

"Blood flows down one leg and up the other."

"Respiration is composed of two acts, first inspiration, and then expectoration."

"The moon is a planet just like the earth, only it is even deader."

"Artifical insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull."

"Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire."

"A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold."

"Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas."

"The body consists of three parts- the brainium, the borax and the abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowels, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u."

"The pistol of a flower is its only protections against insects."

"The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana."

"The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and the outsides have ben taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is something to hitch meat to."

"A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, eight cuspids, two molars, and eight cuspidors."

"The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight."

"A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is."

"Many women belive that an alcoholic binge will have no ill effects on the unborn fetus, but that is a large misconception."

"Equator: A managerie lion running around the Earth through Africa."

"Germinate: To become a naturalized German."

"Liter: A nest of young puppies."

"Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat."

"Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away."

"Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky."

"Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot."

"Vacumm: A large, empty space where the pope lives."

"Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the blood is affirmative or negative."

"To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose."

"For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower then the body until the heart stops."

"For dog bite: put the dog away for sevral days. If he has not recovered, then kill it."

"For asphyxiation: Apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead."

"To prevent contraception: wear a condominium."

"For head cold: use an agonizer to spray the nose until it drops in your throat."

"To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the cow."

[Kitten Medli]

"To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the cow."

Haha. lawlawlawl.. I liked some of the other ones too, like apply artifical respiration until the patient is dead XD

[Combusken BG]

Supposed to be "real" science test answers, but since they aren't on pictures, you never know.

"When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire."

"H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water"

"To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube"

"When you smell an odorless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide"

"Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state"

"Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water."

"Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillars."

"Blood flows down one leg and up the other."

"Respiration is composed of two acts, first inspiration, and then expectoration."

"The moon is a planet just like the earth, only it is even deader."

"Artifical insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull."

"Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire."

"A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold."

"Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas."

"The body consists of three parts- the brainium, the borax and the abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowels, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u."

"The pistol of a flower is its only protections against insects."

"The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana."

"The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and the outsides have ben taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is something to hitch meat to."

"A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, eight cuspids, two molars, and eight cuspidors."

"The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight."

"A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is."

"Many women belive that an alcoholic binge will have no ill effects on the unborn fetus, but that is a large misconception."

"Equator: A managerie lion running around the Earth through Africa."

"Germinate: To become a naturalized German."

"Liter: A nest of young puppies."

"Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat."

"Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away."

"Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky."

"Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot."

"Vacumm: A large, empty space where the pope lives."

"Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the blood is affirmative or negative."

"To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose."

"For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower then the body until the heart stops."

"For dog bite: put the dog away for sevral days. If he has not recovered, then kill it."

"For asphyxiation: Apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead."

"To prevent contraception: wear a condominium."

"For head cold: use an agonizer to spray the nose until it drops in your throat."

"To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the cow."

I think I going to need some Brain Bleach after reading that since I found it very funny.

[Shoyru_Lover]

There was a maths test in grade 11 that I found difficult, and I was sitting there thinking "Oh noes... I'm gonna get a really bad mark."

Then I turn to the last page and there is a bonus question.

The teacher thought he was smart by putting a ridiculously super-hard bonus question worth 50% that he thought no one was going to be able to solve.

Funnily, despite not being able to do any of the other questions properly, I was the only one in class that was able to complete the bonus question.

I topped the class in maths for that test. I got 113%.

[Asthaloth]

There was a maths test in grade 11 that I found difficult, and I was sitting there thinking "Oh noes... I'm gonna get a really bad mark."

Then I turn to the last page and there is a bonus question.

The teacher thought he was smart by putting a ridiculously super-hard bonus question worth 50% that he thought no one was going to be able to solve.

Funnily, despite not being able to do any of the other questions properly, I was the only one in class that was able to complete the bonus question.

I topped the class in maths for that test. I got 113%.

Did the same myself, but unfortunately there were no marks for the silly question. (Some rubbish about advanced Quadratic equations that I have some gift to be able to do)

[pipsqueeek]

Kuge, those are amazing. I've even seen them before, and they still had me completely cracking up. I really like: "to prevent contraception, wear a condominium"

[Rachel]

my friend, in one of our 2nd year exams at uni wrote "only smarties have the answer" for one of the questions as she didnt know the answer.

[Mongrel]

At my high school, the seniors have to write an open-response answer to some idiot question every year. It's kind of pointless, because no one feels like trying and there's no carrot they can dangle since the scores come out after we graduate. So everyone just dashes off whatever random thing they want. A girl sitting next to my sister made a list of all the girls at the school that she didn't like. My friend wrote about how Julius Caesar probably would've owned pit bulls if he could. And the absolute best was one a kid in my Latin class wrote: the topic was teachers who've inspired you, and he wrote all about "Mr. Gobbles," who was actually a turkey(this was never mentioned outright in the essay, but it was pretty darn obvious from reading it). The kicker was that he wrote it in the shape of a hand turkey.

[Shoyru_Lover]

Got some more.

[Shakira_Shoyru]

I do remember that, not only did I do the Pythagorian x thingy on a math formative but...
I also wrote Banana in a Physics exam and Dinosaur in a History one.
Well, I didn't know the answers. lol XD