Anyone know where I can get some answering machine messages?

[Ski]

http://dedicated.goofball.com/goofball/ ... 404361.mp3
The best answering machine message ever!

VTP 404: Owner not found?
(link is broken)

Oh, whoops.
I'll try finding it somewhere else.
It says:
"Hi, we're not in right now to take your call, but if you'd like to leave us a message, please press pound, press 3, then dial your name, then press 6 and dial your number, then press star, press 69, ask for extension 4443 (forty-four forty-three), then leave your name and message. If you want to leave your number and the time you called, please press star twice, bark like a dog, spin in a circle, press 1 twenty-six times, and wait for the beep."

[Robert]

Connery ideas:
"Hullo, thish is Sean Connery. You've reached the voishemail of shuch-and-sho, who obviously can't be bothered with anshering hish phone. Sho leave a messhage and, I preshume, he (or she) will get back to you. (pause) Now will you pleashe untie me?"

"Do you ekshpect me to talk?"
"No, Mister Bond, I expect you to *beep*"

Wow, that Actually made me laugh out loud! I'm not the only one who thinks Sean Connery sounds like that!!!

[fzun]

The Hitchhikers quote is awesome XD. I should do that on my phone.

This one my friend has that I love:

"Hello" [other person starts talking here] "Yeah, I know" [more talking] "Uh huh" [let them keep talking] "No.." [yep, they're still talking] "Hello?"

and it just keeps going on and on and it's so funny because everyone falls for it over and over XD

[Sock]

Hello. This is Weezel's answering machine, Marvin, and I'm so depressed. I have 50,000 times the memory capacity of my owner, but all I get to do is answer the phone. Life. Don't talk to me about life. Just leave your name and number after the beep. Here comes the beep, how I hate that beep, it's so cheery sounding.

Hitchhikers! @.@ I might have to use that. I just saw it on goodquotes.com too. ^^

I really need something more interesting. "Hi, it's Holly. I'm not here right now. But I like messages...so leave me one."

[The Wonder Weezel]

"This is the Orange Answerphone. The person you are calling is not available at the moment, please leave a message after the tone."

Meh.

I personally enjoy ones that go:

"hello?......yeah, ok, you?......what?.....I can't hear you......speak up a bit!" and so on until....*beep*

hehe, i started using that one and all my friend tried to copy me.... but i totally got them all when i did it.... mine was perfect! I went "Hello?..... Hey, whats up?........ WAIT wait wait wait... who is this again? OHHHHH hahaha sorry, my cell phone doesnt have caller ID! Hey hey, can I get back to you? because i have to run... just...just leave a message after the beep please, thanks! *beep*

and i had people carry on whole conversations with my answering machine. it was awesome.

[Anna]

This website is the best for those: http://www.goodquotes.com/answeringmachine.htm
Haha I love it!