A one-inch thick piece of plywood should be sufficient protection against radiation.
Do not drive a station wagon if a power pole is protruding from the hood.
If you lose a contact lens during a chemical attack, do not stop to look for it.
If you are trapped under falling debris, conserve oxygen by not farting.
If your lungs and stomach start talking, stand with your arms akimbo until they stop.
After exposure to radiation it is important to consider that you may have mutated to gigantic dimensions: watch your head.
If a door is closed, karate chop it open.
Hurricanes, animal corpses and the biohazard symbol have a lot in common. Think about it
The proper way to eliminate smallpox is to wash with soap, water and at least one(1) armless hand.
Use your flashlight to lift the walls right off of you!
If you have set yourself on fire, do not run.









